HCOM 214: Interpersonal COMM & Conflict

Learning interpersonal communication skills to improve every part of our lives

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Workplace Relationships Prompt#5

I consider most of my coworker’s friends because we actually care about each other’s well-being outside of work. I consider around two as possible best friends, I already have three of them, because we hang out constantly after work. We do text or Snapchat each other just to see how our days are going. We do communicate and tell each other personal stuff that you would not tell a normal coworker, there are some(mostly older coworkers) were it is just strictly professional. Peer relationships do not negatively affect my job satisfaction because being a shift supervisor I have to be fair with everyone even if I do like some more than others. I tend to be pretty professional with my job because that is what is required of me.

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Friends-Prompt #2

I do believe that friendships are easier to break than those of family but not necessarily romantic. A family doesn’t just mean blood relation, many people have family in which they don’t share blood. The bond is so strong that people can find easy to make family outside of whom they share blood with. Romantic and friendships are on the same scale because both can lack the closeness, trust, and dedication, they can both falter. Most of the time romantic relationships usually start with friendships so they are built on similar foundations. Family, no matter the fault, always finds a way to mend or create a new bond, which can sometimes better a relationship. Many people may not agree with this, but with personal experience, I do believe family is above friends and romantic partners depending on the situation.

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Family Members​ Prompt 1

Being a Latino means that at family parties you have to greet everyone and by everyone, I do mean EVERYONE. This is a rule that has been in my family for as long as a remember, you go up to your close family(family you are extremely close to) by giving them hugs and saying hello. Your elders, grandma and aunts, you hug, give a peck on the cheek and chat for a while. For my uncles, it is mostly a handshake, a nod of acknowledgment or you just chat and joke around for a while. For those people you do not know at the party you still have to say hello or say good afternoon to them. If anyone from my family sees that you do not do that they make sure you. If anyone at the get together sees someone eating alone or is just isolating themselves, family members tend to pry and push you to mingle. Communication and the way you portray how you communicate with others is extremely important at my family parties or my family members will hold it against you.

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Managing Conflict and Power Prompt 10

There was this one conflict I had with my father around 5 years ago were I noticed that he treated me differently than the rest of my siblings. I never was extremely close to my father, I was able to have a deeper bond with my mother which I believe my father was envious of. One day I confronted him over the phone about him treating me differently because I had a closer relationship with my mother, he’s a truck driver so he’s not home very often, and he got angry stating that it wasn’t true. We kept bickering back and forth until he finally clicked, which angered me more and we did not communicate for over 2 weeks even when he was home. One day my mother had enough and forced us to talk about the issue and my mom even noticed how differently he treated me from the rest of my siblings. He would start of by having me do everything around the house and any work he needed to be done, even though he told my brother’s to do it first he would take away that chore and add it to mine. I explained how this kind of treatment didn’t make me feel like I was in a home. It took time to improve our relationship, but I feel like the conflict would not have escalated to such lengths if I would have just talked to my father in person rather then over the phone. I feel like he thought it wasn’t a serious issue and that I was exaggerating the problem.

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NonVerbal Communication Prompt 2

According to the Self-Quiz “Are you an M-Time or P-Time Person?,” I am a M-Time person. I value time and must follow a strict time schedule in order to not stress by letting my duties or responsibilities pile up. I tend to be on time to every appointment I have, my classes and even when I am hanging out with my friends. If I know I will be running late, most of the time I will send a message(either by call or text) that I will be running late. Managing my time has allowed me to set a working schedule that will not interfere with my school schedule and personal schedule. Being able to plan on a planner or calendar when certain assignments, payments or readings are due save me a lost of stress because I can plan out everything in an orderly fashion. Even though planning and trying to save time gets a little tedious it is better for me to be an organized mess rather than an unorganized one :).

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Verbal Communication Prompt #1

I would not change my legal name for personal reasons as to if i did not like it because my family gave me the name and even though it had no deep meaning when I was given the name it is a part of me that I would not like to completely change. I would only change my legal name if when getting married, such as if my spouse wants to hyphenate I will gladly do so. The language characteristic that supports my choice is Language Evolves, meaning that thought out time one can change the meaning of word or the action behind it. The reason as to why i would hyphenate when married is several reasons, if my spouse wants to we will, I want both of our last names to be present on our children’s names and it would be an honor to be able to have another represent my spouses family. I believe it will tie me closer to the family and allow myself to be more included.

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Prompt 11

I tend to suppress a lot of my emotions when I am with my family. Im one who doesn’t really like to talk about issues happening in my life that lead me to feeling certain emotions I don’t want to surface. One situation which lead me to suppressing my emotions was when I my father tends to lecture me and tries to guide me on how I need to become responsible and successful. He tends to rant about how I need to stop having so much “fun” and focus on my studies. He believes that his way is the right way, so if I am playing video game son my day off from work/school, he’ll tell me I’m wasting my time and I should utilize it more for educational purposes. I suppress my anger and sadness at the fact that my father believes that just because I want to have fun and relax for a bit without having to worry about responsibilities because I feel like that would lead to a huge argument I do not want to have with him. I feel like the suppression of these emotions leads me to be extremely sarcastic with my father and I tend to try and annoy him as much as possible. I guess you can call it passive aggressiveness. I have now come into the conclusion that if I tell my father that I will determine how I spend my time is working out for me that he should be ok with my decisions. I do not have to follow his advice if I do not choose to and I am allowed to make my own mistakes. Suppression may work for now but bottling the emotions may lead to me exploding and maybe leading to saying things I might regret.

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Prompt #8

I took the empathy quiz, and it was concluded that I have pretty decent empathy for those around me. I scored around 3-4 for every question, which made me realize I’m pretty attuned to the people around me. I will try to make them as comfortable as possible when in a conversation and not judge them from what I see. I find it pretty easy to empathize in any situation, usually I give people the benefit of the doubt for mostly anything. I pretty sensitive to the emotions around me because I feel like people need someone to try and understand them. Some situations I would find difficult to empathize others is when maybe they are going to hurt someone, or have hurt me personally more than once. For example, if they give me a reason as to why they hurt someone emotionally, it makes it difficult for me to have empathize and try to understand their reason because they still hurt someone. Same would go for someone who has done the same to me, but just because it makes it difficult it does not mean that I hold a grudge.

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Prompt #4

During my childhood I was labeled as a timid young boy do to speaking so soft and low. This resulted in me in not becoming actively social and making it really difficult for me to make friends. I was extremely introverted, which led to me focusing on my studies rather then actually talking to other children and playing. I would head to the library during my breaks and read instead of socializing with other children. This lasted till the end of middle school, which I decided at the end of my eighth grade year I would become more social. This lead to me running for student government positions in high school, thus leading me to actively putting myself out there and socialize with others. No only did I have to improve my social skills but I also had to prepare myself to actively speak in public. I decided to take a huge leap and I have had no regrets. By the end of my freshman year I knew everyones name in my class and I was able to socialize with them. All four years of high school I was the treasure for my class, thus leading to socializing with people older and younger than me. This opportunity allowed me to make great friends and thus I still keep in contact with a good amount of my former classmates.