HCOM 214: Interpersonal COMM & Conflict

Learning interpersonal communication skills to improve every part of our lives

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Giving Away To Much?

Talking about the social penetration theory, and knowing that there are many layers of the self that we share and disclose to others. With some people we share a lot of information or give it away freely, but for many others we keep it inside and don’t share something with them unless they are giving some type of information in return. For example, asking someone their favorite color, they respond with “Blue” and then, they can ask the same question and start to generate a conversation of giving and taking. With this form of communication many people keep information about themselves private, or at least unknown to the person they are currently talking too.

“Too much too soon” has never really been a problem for me in relationships that I have had for a long time, but new ones are a whole different story. With old relationships I can give any information away about myself and feel completely comfortable. On the other hand in new relationships I am very cautious at what I say and tell people about myself. “Too much too soon”, has never terminated a relationship of mine. If something I say comes out of my mouth than it is what it is. I never put myself into compromising situations on purpose to where I spill out information.

In the case of dealing with a friend or date who has shared too much early in a relationship, I think that I would handle it fairly well. If someone says something about themselves because they wanted to share it even though it might be too much at the time, they obviously wanted you to know that about them. I have no problem in knowing “too much too soon”. If the topic was a little out of place I would question where the information was coming from. Topics that I consider to be “too much too soon” would be, talking about sexual activities, knowing too much about where one lives or how often they walk or drive to school, or even personal family matters.

Everyone in the world has their own way of talking to other people and telling them information about themselves. Some people are Chatty Cathy’s and can talk forever about anything, while some people would rather veer off to the left and go around certain topics or information. To all their own and any form of communication is great.